I am leaving at the crack of dawn Thursday for a trip to see family. So I’ve been trying to do some work to clear some stuff before I go.
I belong to a fantastic group of ladies who are mutually supportive of each others’ journeys and I had posted about stuck energy, a theme that has been hanging out since February or thereabouts. One of the ladies asked me what I wanted to accomplish on this trip.
Honestly, nothing. I mean, I will get to see extended family, commiserate about life, get a change of scenery, and so on but emotionally? Nothing.
The odd thing is, I thought I was OK with being single. As I get closer to this trip, I realize that maybe I’m not. A friend of mine suggested an exercise to me that I will attempt to employ once I grab a lighter on my way home.
What does it mean to me to be single?
What does it mean to me to be married?
I do realize, as I’ve gotten closer to this trip and been doing work like crazy that maybe it’s not what I think it is…so I’m trying to let it be what it is, bring it forth, see it, deal with it and heal it. I don’t know what is there but to be brutally honest, I’m tired of holding onto it. It’s akin to someone saying “here, hold this”, handing you a duffel bag and walking off…
I’m wondering what is in it? What is so damn important that I think I have to hold on to it, or hold it back?
For the sake of the argument, what if I said, “My intention is to just let go of whatever it is. I don’t have any idea what it is. It feels stuck and negative but it does NOT feel like it serves any positive purpose at this juncture. I trust the universe to give me what’s best for me when I let got of this situation/energy so that I can hold space for the love, joy and positivity that is meant for me!” And then energetically trusted myself and God to handle it…and let. It. Go.
Think I’ll try that!