So, it’s 2014! So far, it’s been a great year. Last week, I had my first meeting with Marlo in the new year. I re-read the letter to my rapist, the 2nd letter, and we talked about the break point. I hadn’t read the letter in about 3 weeks and the last time I read it, I was OVER it! I finished reading it but was done with it…or so I thought!
So imagine my surprise when I read it again last Tuesday night and was again in tears. The breaking point seemed to be me NOT believing I am strong. So, I re-read it in my session. Marlo suggested I didn’t need the letter or the notebook. That it was my shield. She challenged me to let go of the letter, to get rid of it. So I did.
I came home, went through the notebook and tore out every page that had writing on it. Anything not affirmative was torn in 4 for recycling. This was my letter to Mark.
Then I burned it on Thursday. There is no more letter.
I wrote my TEDx talk about rape and having the courage to heal and nominated myself for not one, but TWO, TEDx forums and I finished my article on rape in the military.
My mind doesn’t quite believe that I’ve let go of it so it’s a daily thing, still, the letting go of it. But I’m ready to surrender it, let go, and start over.